Monday, May 28, 2007

Adrift on the nile

Naguib Mahfouz writes sleek little existential dramas. Now I realise that I have already made the mistake of sounding extremely pseudo and really at this point in time I would do anything to avoid being so, considering this entire world around me seems in this crazy race to destroy themselves. What I mean is that, people in this world are just looking for reasons to ensure other people and, quite often themselves that their lives are worthless if Depression and morbid poetry is not a part of their everyday existence---with black nail polish and dollops of kohl on their eyelids( what the guys refer to as "emo") constituting must have accessories. Not to forget coke snorting which just takes "all the pain" away. What I personally fail to understand is this "pain"--- is it the pain of your parents not giving you enough pocket money or a girlfriend who refused to sleep with you or the pain of not having "this pain"--the ,what must seem, immense inability to feel the pain that ur peers so easily do, that inevitably pushes you towards yet again, this pain.

I dunno if its the book or association with vague people that has made me digress so much but lets get on with the point(which i have obviously forgotten by now..)

Last weekend I was at a friends place. Which led to me to a few observations. So i present them ala Mahyfouz style


Scenario for a play:


Characters involved


1. A silent invisible character lets call her Gangal: Usually observed( if you notice closely because this species takes special pleasure in playing dead) trying to hide in one corner of a medium sized room( without purpose, if you havent realised already).Takes immense pleasure when she is talked about by other visible people.. which is rarely so she takes lives for each moment. Usually mentioned in passing conversation when describing a silent invisible character or to make sure that this person is in fact not dead or has not disappeared.

Other purposes to this character include being used to sit upon by overweight or obese characters in Padmasan as an attempt to exert their superiority over such weaklings..

Usually used as rag dolls or as playthings or the Barbies we used to tear the heads off...


2. An overweight/obese character: Usually observed hogging a medium sized bed making it impossible for other normal sized people to be seated in comfort. So the other normal sized people are compelled to act like Palestininian refugees occupying one tiny little corner this medium sized bed. Usually this obese character-- lets call it "bhu" for purposes (both male and female) usually prides itself in its ability to prey on other creatures of the lost ark. Characterized by the presence of a mammoth earthquakish type laughter involving numerous rumblings of the voice and some more violent bed shaking and occasionally an emphatic Tarzan like chest thumping. Seen using their body weight as part of an elaborate Iron Maidenish torture mechanism---ask thin/invisible character for torture references. Usually the one on whom the joke is on.. although if the obese character(usually assumed to be fat headed as well) does realise it is on her, circumstances will be dire for anyone who remotely partook in the joke.
Other characteristics include an insatiable desire for sex and all things of the flesh( pun not intended) and musings about long lost navy men and bulldogs. Not excluding the evil eye on other boyfriends.

I have successfully managed to describe two of the extreme species.Allow me one more indiscretion for I shall keep you waiting for another post for the rest of the characters in my absurd play of errors... if anyone is listening albeit.

3 comments:

Doubletake, Doublethink. said...

i'm almost scared to read the next post. vague/schizophrenic character? just you dare.

this sort of blatant diatribe really isn't good. narf, who am i kidding. get on with it, and bash socialite/smoking character too.

Anonymous said...

Hey. The reasons for depression may seem trivial, not only to you but also to the depressed one although he/she will not admit it even to himself/herself but knows it deep down and the triviality of that which is bugging you makes it even more depressing, coz it makes you feel weak esp when coming across blogs like yours full of sarcasm and disdain for the so called 'pain' which is actually real. Despite popular belief, most people are intelligent and common sensed and know and acknowledge that happy is the ideal way to be. But some can't achieve it for some reason or another, psychological or whatever. Depression is a disease and a cry for help, no matter how trivial the cry may seem, the hurt is very much real. Don't trivialize something which is so intensely personal like feeling sad and letting other people know. If its attention an emo wants, give it to him/her. Everybody's happy.

speedpost said...

@Anonymous:
1. Its very childish to call yourself anonymous. If you are so hellbent on proving your point, maybe you should reveal your name. It would make it easier for everyone involved.
2. Its called opinion. Everyone is allowed to have one. And its not like I am immune to every sort of depression...its just that I choose a different avenue to vent my frustration. To each his own.