Thursday, January 31, 2008

Of Serbia and Mamunis.

First things first, since this is somewhat of an online diary, I must, once in a while keep in phase with reality and write about things that ACTUALLY happen in my life and not things I make up(which I seem to do surprisingly often, nowadays)

GOOD THINGS

1. Djokovic won!
Hail all hot Serbian men with unpronounceable names. They make your life and my life a little more scrumptious and livable-worthy.


2. I met Samit Basu. *waits for the applause*
So, he is unlike NewageScheherazade's and Doubletake, Doublethink's GHM,for the uninitiated--a Georgette Heyer Man. And looks like a Software Engineer with a nickname like Bumba. But he is still pretty brilliant. And capable of making women go weak in the knees. And capable of turning normal women into an escort( i.e Double take) or Glenn Close in Fatal Attraction( Naughty Naughty! As Mrs. Sen on Radio Mirchi would tell our Scheherazade)

3. Calcutta is having its first REAL winter in years. And I'm supposed to turn up on my Farewell in a sari, with BBC predicting temperatures to be as low as 8 degrees tomorrow. Spoils the entire purpose of such a season--curling up under my favourite blanket with one of THOSE books--The ones which read like something as delicious as Eatable Marshmallow Pillows from Mr. Wonka's Chocolate Factory.

4. I finally managed to get more in Maths than in Bengali. That makes everyone happy, I guess.
Apart from my Bengali teacher I think

5. A cousin of mine is staying with us. He's come down from New Zealand and speaks with an Australian accent, which makes it nearly impossible for my mum to understand anything he says in English but he is pretty conversant in Bangla( much to the relief of the cow-like herd of relatives he's being exposed to, of late--but he is surprisingly sporting about it)
I, for one, was two when he left for NZ but my other cousins and he pretty much relive old times everyday. Its so much fun to be a Bangali with a hot cup of coffee amidst random recollections of ancient, embarrassing memories . Because surprisingly, those are the memories you'll always remember...

BAD THINGS

Not surprisingly this clearly outnumbers the Good Things. But just for the sake of Doubletake's patience I'm keeping it to five.

1. No Book Fair this year. At least as far as I know.
I'm all for a clean environment but somethings are downright unacceptable. Like no Book Fair in the middle of this fairy-like winter time. And its NOT because of the absence of Georgia Tea and "Cutlet Bhaja" !

2. Chickens, which have taken it upon themselves to behave like Nicole Richie. Pricey, Anorexic. And diseased for the most part. I have also often thought our CM resembles a spectacled one. It makes explanation, of a lot of things in this state much simpler.

3. Wedding Season: It is time for all the Mamunis and Rijus of West Bengal to come out in their best Rainbow-Saris and Dhuti Pajama for Biyebaari and Boubhat(Wedding and Reception, respectively. But they sound so much grander this way, na?) In the absence of our chickens, Bangalis are forced to pledge their allegiance to mutton.
So the menu MUST consist of:

Fried Rice/Pulao: Extremely damp. Reminds me of the In-Laws.

Motton Kosha: Cooked in so much ghee that the Mughals would be put to shame. Resembles the bride-to-be all decked up.

Fish Fry: Is meant ideally to be crispy. And stuffed with all the fish humanly possible. But turns out to neither. If you look close enough, its much like the groom -to-be with a topor on his head much like this...


Papad bhaja/ Chutney: Not really necessary. But have to be there. Much like the five hundred people, including me, who turn up at a wedding for people they don't quite know.

I had three weddings to attend, in case you didn't realise the source of all this frustration. One day of thanda luchi is fine. Three days--not quite...

4. I had my first Board Practical today. Biotechnology--the only subject I am remotely confident at. My examiner, on the other hand, had other plans. He looked conspicuously like Dawood Ibrahim, answered questions he asked us himself, and seemed more interested in his lunch than anything else.
Did I mention he asked questions which even our own teachers didn't have answers to?

5. Heath Ledger died. Now he probably was a little stupid, ODing and all(because I guess you have to be quite a dolt to OD). But he was pretty darn good. As Casanova, as Ennis Del Mar, as Bob Dylan and hopefully, as the Joker. And had one of the nicest smiles. And although sometimes he superceded Marlon Brando in his next-to-impossible to understand dialogue delivery, he more than made up for it in other ways. May the Overdoser's Heaven accept him in all its glory.

59 comments:

Doubletake, Doublethink. said...

accha there is just too much in this post to comment about. you are the backs!

and the picture of the bride and groom - i'm still laughing.

i did not get invited to a single bangali wedding this year. i usually go for the fishfry, so i am very glad you gave it its due.

heh? ok said...

heath ledger. why?

anyway, dramatics aside, enjoy the weddings, coz hell knows it's only when others are getting married that you can have a good time, relatively.

Fishy! said...

Me love Fish Fry.
Shame about Heath Ledger though. May his soul rest in peace.

ad libber said...

I have a feeling ppl get married to feed fish fries to hungry students.
As about Samit Basu, I fell in love with him the day I learnt he left IIM A for greener pastures like documentary film making. That man is an inspiration.
And..ah chicken :(

speedpost said...

doubletake: Yesh. I'm laughing too.

heh?ok: I've always liked heath ledger. Even though he slurred.
At least he doesn't pretend he can act. Which I cant say for the truckloads of Keanu Reeves.
And I do enjoy the weddings. There is something innately fun in them. Especially when you have cousins like mine.

@fishy!: Yes. Your name does say a lot, Tuna.
And I know. He's pretty brilliant as Bob Dylan. Watch I'm Not There.

@ad libber: My respect for Samit Basu quadrupled after I found out he dropped out. And you should have been there at the book launch. Hell lot of fun.

heh? ok said...

no, no. my question was WHY did he have to DIE? the drama queen in me can be confusing sometimes.

Maximum Boy said...

i want to a be a software engineer!
and a tennis player too.

i know this female who's called trisha and she has her msn name as trish fry.

and i agree with priyanka, there's too much to comment on.

oh and i also like the fact i've been added to both of your link lists! :P

speedpost said...

@heh?ok: But I guess being a drama queen sort of gives you that license anyway. So no worries.

@Maximum Boy: Well, ur not a Bengali boy who wants to be a software engineer and get a good ranking "In Joint"(which makes it sound like weed rather than a competitive examination). So don't take as it being derogatory.

And who wouldn't want to be a tennis player? There's the trophy where you can cook soup for the entire population of Botswana not to forget the female fan adulation that you can be SURE of getting!

ad libber said...

I know :(
I hated myself for missing it but my beloved college refuses to believe I do not take my graduation degree seriously and made me sit for exams.
Wait till I drop out... :D

quietlittleshything said...

were you one of the tinykids sitting in the frontrow at the booklaunch? then methinks i saw you (and you sawme too).

speedpost said...

@ad libber: Well, Samit Basu DID come out from your college. So you're excused. And drop out quicker. I want to be the first one to receive my copy of your first book in the mail.
@quitelittleshything:Not really. I was in the last row. Along with Doubletake. And asked the question about the genies. In case you remember. And if anything I'm not little. Well, not anymore.

new age scheherazade said...

oh brilliant.and priyanka's right, so i'll point-ize, like you should do for the boards. practice.

1.i have a cousin who's going to be a software engineer, and his nickname just happens to be bumba. but he is a bit of a GHM, so..

2.I once had a cousin over from Australia. he tried to play catch on the main road, and his sister liked banging her head on the floor saying "people people people".
these foreigners are weird.

3. The Book Fair and chicken double blow is just too much at once. couple it with the boards and you've got a perfect mass teenager suicide situation. i think the newspapers are covering it up.

undifferentiated said...

aha anutha samit fan.does he know he's thot of as such a cause of women to go weak in the knees.gotta tell him. haha.
n heath ledger was such a piece of mah hrt.still in mournin.he is an excellent actor.and whtta smile!

speedpost said...

@new age: But bumba doesnt read. so too bad. and anyway there is a new man in ur life isnt there now? bsnl here i come!
@undifferentiated: Yes someone SHOULD tell him.
and i saw brokeback the other day again. my mom thought I had a nervous breakdown or something, i was sniffling so defiantly.

VelocityGirl (tm) said...

OMG HAHA, u put up bula-di versions of bride and groom!!

speedpost said...

@velocity girl: I had to pay my respects to one of the most pioneering symbols of our age!

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